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McCONNELL WARNS THAT NATION TEETERS ON THE EDGE OF DEMOCRACY

By NATO Training Mission-Afghanistan MCC(SCW) Francis J. Carroll [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

(Political Satire) (WASHINGTON–June 28, 2017) With a somber expression, Majority Leader Mitch McConnell told The Failing Times today that unless his party comes together to pass the most devastating reduction in health care for the American people in history, there is a chance that the nation may “take a dangerous turn towards democracy.”

“We are at a crossroads,” McConnell said, stone faced. “Unless we can ram this thing through, and quickly, while the rest of America is blowing of fingers with firecrackers and choking on hot dogs, there is a real and horrible chance that we may have to resort to bipartisanship,–actually talking to and negotiating with– Democrats. I know that sends a chill down the spine of every patriot across this land.”

President Trump reacted to McConnell’s statement with one of his own.

“I’m going to one of my golf resorts, where I can watch others blow off their fingers and choke on hot dogs, and you know what? It won’t matter, because, see, I’ll be having a beautiful piece of chocolate cake, believe me.”

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POLITICAL SATIRE. Not Real News

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