News Ticker

Trump leaves binky and blue blankey at NATO meeting; White House in chaos

(POLITICAL SATIRE) (WASHINGTON–June 7, 2017) The White House was sent into emergency mode when it was discovered that President Trump had somehow left his pacifier and blue blanket at the NATO meeting.

“With all the pressure leading up to James Comey’s testimony today, the President really needs his binky and his fuzzy blanket,” a White House Spokesman told The Failing Times.

According to sources, the military was dispatched to do a search and rescue earlier this week. When that wasn’t successful, Reince Priebus and Sean Spicer were dispatched with flashlights to search themselves.

“In the meantime,” the spokesman said, “the President has to get by with his Tickle Me Elmo.”


Support The Failing Times on PATREON.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: