(Political Satire)(WASHINGTON–April 3, 2017) President Trump refused to tell himself what his secret plan for dealing with the nuclear threat from North Korea was, citing national security.
“I’d love to tell myself the plan,” Trump said, “But it’s a secret plan. The best secret plan. And I can’t just go around telling everybody what it is, especially myself. I mean, what it I Tweeted about it at 3 AM or something? That would be a breach of something, you know? But trust me, all the best people are telling me my secret North Korea plan is very good. I think you’ll be pleased.”
Sources close to the President told The Failing Times that Trump’s refusal to tell himself what his secret plan is may be a negotiating ploy.
“It makes him look stronger to be unpredictable,” the source said. “Even he doesn’t quite know what he’ll do next.”
When pressed, the President admitted that was a possibility.
“I’m a very tough negotiator, even with myself,” he said. “This is a tactic right out of my playbook. It’s these same skills that got us such a great deal on healthcare, and I’m sure it’s going to work big on North Korea.”
POLITICAL SATIRE. Not Real News