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The 99% leave planet in massive exodus before Trump inauguration; GOP stays

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(Political Satire, Still Legal in the U.S.A) (JOHNSON SPACE CENTER–JAN 19, 2017) In anticipation of the last day worth living in the United States of America, all but the wealthiest 1% of Americans have left the planet Earth.

“This massive secret project, financed by the leftover funds from Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders’ presidential campaigns, sent a massive space craft filled with the middle class and the poor, blasting towards Alpha Centauri,” project chairman Stephen Hawking said.

“We have been secretly building this rocket since the election. It was an easy project to hide,” Prof. Hawking continued. “Since most members of the incoming administration don’t believe in science, we knew they’d never look at NASA. ”

Middle class Trump supporters also signed up once they figured out that there was no chance he’d  keep a single promise.

It was confirmed that Barack Obama and Joe Biden, also onboard, have agreed to form a government that will include Hillary Clinton, Bernie Sanders, and Michelle Obama.

It was confirmed that the name of the ship is, the “USS Thank God We Are Out of There.”

News traveled fast about the departure, and some GOP Leaders were worried that only billionaires, and Ted Nugent, were left behind on Earth.

“If everybody is gone except the Oligarchs, ” Speaker of the House Paul Ryan said, “whose benefits are we going to cut?”

Early today, a last message was received from the space ship:

“So long, suckers.”

 

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Political Satire, not real news.

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