(Political Satire, Still Legal in the USA) EXCLUSIVE– Warmed by Russian President Vladimir Putin’s criticism of his Presidential rival, Hillary Clinton, President-elect Donald Trump’s staff announced that the two leaders will be exchanging gifts and spending Christmas Eve together.
There is no official confirmation on just what gifts will be exchanged, but, rumors are swirling that Trump is giving Putin a friendship charm in the shape of the earth cut in two, with “Forever Friends” engraved across it. Mr. Trump will keep one half and give Mr. Putin the other half, but sources inside the Kremlin say that Mr. Putin may just take both halves as a symbol of Russian domination and strength.
For his gift to Trump, President Putin is rumored to be re-gifting a boxed set CD collection of the Greatest Hits of Pussy Riot, a band that was jailed for criticizing him.
Here is the itinerary for Christmas Eve, obtained by a source inside the Trump camp:
7:00 PM– Dinner, drinks
7:30 — Floor by floor Christmas Caroling at Trump Tower. Mr Putin is rumored to sing bass, with Mr. Trump enjoying singing the soprano parts.
8:00– Sleigh Ride through Central Park. Trump rumored to show Putin where he plans drilling for oil in the park.
8:30– Mr. Putin reads How The Grinch Stole Christmas to Mr. Trump, followed by a new picture book he commissioned, How The Vlad Stole Election.
9:00– Eggnog and cookies, Trump dresses like Santa, exchange gifts, Putin sets fire to tree, hugs good-bye.
This story is POLITICAL SATIRE and NOT Real News. Smile, everybody.